Education & World Domination

Well my holidays have started and less than a week into the same, I find myself sitting in front of my laptop with nothing to do. I believe boredom is the best motivator of them all, so I soon found myself nodding to the little voice in my head advising me to use my time productively. Usually I continue nodding until I nod off to sleep but today I decided to actually do something. Like revive my blog, which if was not virtual would have been like my room in my college hostel – full of live insects, cobwebs and half written ideas on papers…

Ok I am just kidding.

The situation was never that bad. The room just has dead insect bodies, cobwebs and half written ideas on papers.Oh don’t cringe! Am back in my house – a place filled with magic! The laundry is done magically, food is good magically, my room is cleaned every two days magically and so on… But I will miss that room of mine. You see, I graduated (the results will be out in a day but I am fairly sure I did enough to pass in all of the subjects)! Yes… Four long years at that place finally came to an end. And I, like the good son to the society and common sense that I am, have embraced conformity to become perhaps the most predictable of all the species – an Engineer!

Don’t get me wrong… It has been a wonderful four years and I think I did manage to learn a bit here and there. But the week before every set of exams I would always wonder how I came to take up engineering. I am very sure a good number of us ask ourselves this question. No one wants to be an engineer when they are six, unless it is the really cool one like the dude who drives the train. But the numerous train journeys to my college would have replaced that fascination of anyone with revulsion, especially at the Indian railways. (Thank you, Mamtajee!) Of course I never aspired to become a railway engineer when I was young. It was something more predictable of a boy.

Yes… I wanted to be a policeman when I was in kindergarten. Now before you start laughing, I had a very good reason for this. A cot was once stolen from my then home and the police had come to look into it. I remember my dad talking to the policeman and I am very sure he had to bribe the person because my next memory is that of me sitting on my dad’s lap while he dispensed a few pearls of wisdom that I would remember forever. ‘Joe…,’ he started off in a cooing manner. ‘You ask why I gave him money… You see when a policeman comes to you, you have to pay him. Even at shops. The shopkeeper doesn’t get paid. He pays the policeman to buy stuff’. Yes, my dad instilled in me a very comprehensive and pragmatic view of the world from a very young age. And being the money-hungry corrupt kid  that I was, I decided then and there that my life would be spent in pursuit of visiting as many shops as a police officer as possible.

But I grew up. In this phase I watched a lot of Mallu movies. From these films I grasped that the ‘paying-the-policeman’ is a crime and that it can be punished (have to thank Mamootty, Mohanlal & Sureshgopi for this!). And these punishments seem to be meted out in the courts by lawyers. So I decided that I wanted to be a lawyer! Before you mistake me for an angelic kid, understand that I am NOT the kid who gave up his dream when he found out that it was a crime. I merely believed that the next untouchable clique were lawyers. This lasted for about a year until I understood the real concept of a Judge. As you can guess, the calling to be a lawyer vanished. (I didn’t know then that you had to be a lawyer before you became a judge). So there I was, a very satisfied and happy adolescent whose thoughts were constantly somewhat along these lines – ‘So now I can murder anyone and no one can punish me or put me in jail’ *insert smug smile while I picture killing my enemies*. (You only have nemesis and mortal enemies when you are kids – everyone knows that!). 

At this point I can say without doubt that had I not become an engineer, I would have become a criminal mastermind or worse, a politician!

Then I grew up… again! I found out that no one is bigger than the law. ‘Kanoon ke haath bahut lambe hoote hain mere dosth!’... or was it '‘Kanoon ke haath se koi nahi bach saktha'?

(Of course I would grow up once again to learn that Kalmadi and Sharad Pawar are exceptions. If I was a kid now, I would probably say ‘I want to be Kalmadi when I grow up’ or something of the sort.)

Anyway so there I was… All my future plans of corruption, world domination et al - ruined. At this point I became interested in space and black holes and stuff (5^th grade or 6^th grade or so), so I told everyone that my ambition was to become an astronaut. When the science got too hard, boring and too equation-ish, I decided to become a cartoonist. I still remember trying to come up with my own superheroes and comic characters and actually drawing panels of a few stories and stuff. Yes, I can draw stuff in a cartoonish manner pretty decently – bet you didn’t know that!

I really can’t recollect what changed but somewhere along these years, I was told that there was a lot of money in software engineering. I found out that I had a bit of aptitude for it and that I liked it a bit too. Like a true CS engineer, it seemed logical to me and I followed logic.

And before I knew it, the date was 17^th May 2012 and the time now is 2:25 a.m. I am done with 4 years of my college life and I am an engineer. It is not so bad, but nonetheless here is to hoping that I grow up once again and realize my calling is different. After all life is too long to be wasted pursuing a single profession.

Maybe there is time yet for world domination…

(In between there were other phases like wanting to be a psychologist and stuff but these were minor compared to the ones above. But none of these compare to the awesome desire one of my friends had as a child – she wanted to be a WWF wrestler so that she could beat up ‘The Rock’… Needless to say, I am pawned…)

P.S. If you have a better title in mind for this post, let me know in the comments below. (No this is not a cheap trick to get comments... Or maybe it is...)

An Innocent’s Toll

A cloak hung about, darker than night.

Stitched with despair and made of fright.

A flash of silver was the only light,

The Reaper stood smiling at the lil boy’s plight…

‘Who are you n why are you here?’,

His voice was small but crystal clear.

The Reaper gave him a most chilling leer,

For he tasted the boy’s fretful fear!

‘Your mother - boy! She leaves you today!

I will escort her to a place far away.

Where it is cold and the trees don’t sway.

And you will be alone, alone by this bay…’

‘Are you death?’, the boy asked suddenly.

Hollow was his face, but his eyes had glee.

The cloak fluttered and ceased to be eerie.

And the Reaper surprised, spoke carefully.

‘Yes I am but why do you smile?

Men by this time usually taste their own bile,

Specially those who are wicked and vile,

For to escape one’s judgement is simply futile!

But you stand here with fear vanished,

Maybe ‘cos your soul is yet untarnished.

But it won’t be so when I am finished,

Your mother’s soul from her body will be banished!’

‘But the pain! The pain that you put her through,

The disease spreading in her, through and through!

I have watched with despair as her cancer grew…

In spite of the medicine n potions that I brew.

So tell me, will you take away her pain?

N remove from her heart, this disease’s strain?

Will you smear your scythe with her soul’s stain?

I am ready to lose if she is to gain…’

The winds howled and the sky grew darker,

The Reaper’s voice seemed much farther.

‘Insolent boy! I have your father!

But tonight I won’t take your mother

For the dark being that you ridicule,

Is not some ugly wretched old mule! …

So fear me you pretentious fool,

Lest your mother suffer a pain more cruel!’

‘I am sorry but my fear is null.

Perhaps my love has made it dull.

But free my mother n let her fly like the gull,

Freed from her weak body n skull!’

The winds abated but the Reaper stood still,

Until there was no more silence left to fill.

Then came his laughter loud and shrill,

Ending the silence until there was none to kill.

‘The fear you called dull, you will know in time.

Now let us make a deal not concerning dime.

The life that you will lead whether of virtue or crime,

I will decide when it will be your time.

For my part, I will free this woman

N take her to my place which your kind shun.’

The boy, after this pact was spun,

Trembled realizing his choices were none.

‘I accept this offer O kind being,

You can choose my time oh All-Seeing,

When it comes, you won’t find me fleeing,

But rather my head bowed and legs kneeing.’

‘I do have a request in this promise.

You will find that nothing is amiss.

If my time is in between a kiss,

Or when I experience marital bliss,

I ask you for it to be sudden,

So I may not know death as a journey with burden.

But if you find my mood gloomy ‘n sadden,

I would ask you to make my heart gladden

By telling me news of the luxury of the dead,

Before your silver scythe slices my head,

So that I may not die, die in dread;

Waiting for you, on my deathbed.

I would like to be happy when I die,

Wishing despair n sadness a hearty goodbye

I will leave this world with a smile - not a sigh!

Flying, laughing into the sky…’

The Reaper was calm, almost serene,

As the lad was wise, unlike any he had seen.

Courage with a love so pure ‘n pristine,

Had won over Death, quick and clean….

Quietly he then lifted her soul.

The boy had paid handsomely, her toll.

The Reaper into the calm winds then stole;

Drifted to the night, darker than coal.

(Wrote this a long time back. Gave it to the coll mag for publication. They took their sweet time. But FINALLY  I can put it up here...)

Identity

He had never seen any difference between any of them. They were all just neighbours, all alien to the country they were residing in. In a small building with four apartments on every floor, it was inevitable that the usual boisterous group of kids would be formed to drive the adults mad. A large gang of friends – that is all he saw when he looked. The kid living opposite to him was of course no different. In fact, you could almost say that this very same kid Ahmed was his best friend. It had only been less than an year since he moved all the way from India to Kuwait, but he never faced a problem of making new friends. It came easy to him especially with that wide smile of his painted on his face all the time. Ahmed had stayed in Kuwait for the majority of his life and had no problem teaching him a kid’s lifestyle in that place.

It was inevitable that he would join the rest of the kids to play cricket and the latest games on PlayStation every day. He visited Ahmed’s house almost every day and Ahmed and vice versa. Ahmed’s Ammi would always welcome the duo with fresh juice and fuss over Ahmed as he laughed. Ahmed would then switch on the PS and then the gaming would start. At 7 p.m. a knock on the door would be heard. It would be his mother enquiring with a polite smile if he was in their house. She would then ask him to return for dinner and the two friends would bid adieu to meet the next day.

It was almost a daily affair. But then kids don’t need a change in schedule as long as it involves playing. Gradually the two families became more amiable towards each other as the neighbourly feeling set in. A dinner invite there and a birthday party here and pretty soon they were accepted into the society with warm smiles.

Then one day his life changed. The nine year old discovered that his identity was more than just his personality. It was much more.

He had left for school that morning in a normal manner. Nothing out of the ordinary… The van came at 6:30 a.m. to pick him up. Ahmed and he studied in different schools. So he had to be content with the noisy kids from the other buildings. He was a rambunctious kid and soon found himself sitting in the front, right under the watchful eye of the driver. Nothing out of the ordinary…

He attended the first half of the day’s classes after which there was a break. His classmates ran towards the canteen to reserve the 500 fils pizza that they were about to get. He looked around aimlessly wondering how to while away time. A few friends dragged him off to play games along with them and before he knew it recess was over. Nothing out of the ordinary…

The school day ended with him playing badminton during physical education. As soon as the bell rang, there was a flurry of footsteps for the Indian national anthem followed by a mad rush to the awaiting vans to take them home. Nothing out of the ordinary…

He was dropped off at his building. Ahmed would be late by another ten or fifteen minutes or so. He always was. He decided to have lunch and change his clothes before Ahmed came to call him to play cricket. He ran towards the elevator but it wasn’t working. Frowning, he ran all the way up to the 4^th floor to his apartment. He rang the bell and waited.

It was a bit too quiet, he felt. Usually there would be noises from the kitchen as he rang the bell. Noises inviting him for a scrumptious meal… But nothing that day… It wasn’t normal.

He rang once again and then he heard a different set of footsteps. His dad’s… But he never came home at that time. It was only in the evening, right before dinner. Puzzled, he waited as he heard the door being unlatched.

His dad was serious unlike his usual self. He entered the room and saw his mother sobbing noiselessly on the table. He stood stunned for a second. He had never seen his mother cry till that day. She never had a reason to. She was always happy or angry at him. Never depressed… He felt something constricting his throat. He was clueless as to what to do but he knew he had to tell his Mom that everything would be alright. But before he could say anything, he was pulled aside by his father.

‘Son… Do you remember Uncle Antony?’, asked his dad.

He couldn’t recollect his face. After all he had seen him only once in his life so far. His uncle was a very busy man and he used to travel all around the country with his dad making it almost impossible to meet him. Apparently he had met him when he was young, too young to remember. But he had heard a lot about his uncle from his mother. His mother spoke in doting terms about her younger brother. A fine man, she used to say, serving in the army now… such a brave person.

He looked at his father and remained silent. His Dad bit his lower lip and said, ‘He was at Kashmir doing his duty. He was a very brave man but he has left… for heaven. God wanted to meet him early.’

He looked at his father for a second. He was a nine year old. He knew what his father meant. Going to heaven meant death. His uncle was no more. His mother would never meet him again. He suddenly felt very depressed. He would never meet his uncle and neither would his mother. No wonder his mother was so sad. Tears welled up in his eyes…

The apartment door opened in a flash. His father had forgotten to latch it after he had opened it. Standing in the drawing room was his friend Ahmed still in his school clothes and bags. He had come to call him for the daily game. He smiled and looked around. His smile faltered when he saw the scene in the drawing room.

His mother’s eyes looked at Ahmed accusingly. Heaving a breath between sobs, she cried out, ‘How dare you enter my house! My Anto… Killed by your militants! By your people… Get out of my house NOW! Never talk to anyone in my family again you… you filthy Paki’